Relationship Rescue! Do New Things and Boost Your Marriage!
Do you need a relationship rescue? How can doing new things provide a relationship rescue? You have to have a proper balance of both. Experiences, or things, can be activities you participate in together, or they can be the ideas, goals, and objectives you share with each other. You need to share the things you have in common, and the ideas and expectations you share in life. Remember marriage is a double-edged sword when it comes to experiences, activities and ideas. We all want stability and certainty in our marriage. However, what happens if there is nothing but certainty? What happens when your marriage is totally predictable? What happens when things have become so predictable that there is no longer any guessing about anything? Imagine for instance a marriage where you knew what you were going to have for dinner every night of the week. What if you knew that at ten p.m. every Tuesday and Thursday night, and at eight a.m. every Sunday morning you would have sex with your spouse? What would happen if you did not have to think about anything when it came to your spouse, your marriage, or anything in your life for that matter? Some of you may feel that would actually be pretty good. You would like to have that level of comfort with what is going on. It may considerably reduce your level of emotional stress. Sure it would at first, but over time how would you start to feel? Well, after a while you would get tired of having the same meal on the same day every week. It would get boring. It would get monotonous. So what do we mean when we say stability? Each of you needs to know you love each other. You need to know your spouse will always be there for you. The two of you need to be a team. These things must be constant. This helps to explain why marriage is such a great vehicle to provide this kind of stability. Marriage is a legally binding contract. It is where two people publicly go on record and sign a binding union that they are responsible for each other’s happiness and physical and mental health. Study after study has shown that married people are more inclined to stay in a marriage if one spouse becomes seriously ill or injured. Studies also show that as a result, married people live longer because they feel their spouse will be there to take care of them in the event of poor health. In addition, people who are married are usually healthier than their unmarried counterparts. The reason is that spouses will encourage each other to eat better, take better care of each other, and to avoid risky behavior. So what happens at the other extreme? Imagine not being sure when you would be able to see your spouse. Imagine not knowing for sure when you could speak with each other. Imagine not knowing when the two of you would be intimate with each other emotionally and physically. How does this make you feel? I am sure the thought of what I have briefly outlined produces thoughts of stress and extreme nervousness. So, in other words, if you have nothing but total uncertainty, you have nothing but chaos. Chaos does nothing but create massive stress, and eventually excessive stress leads to physical and emotional breakdown/illness. Therefore, you need to have stability while at the same time adding variety to your marriage. Variety for the purpose of this discussion is the type of variety gained through wholesome activities that build the family. These activities are focused on growing closer together and building each other up. They can help you have a good marriage or in your relationship rescue.
Passion results from variety. Excitement increases and interest in each other grows as well. Understanding this can help your relationship rescue. One reason people just starting out in their relationships have so much passion is that everything they do is a new and exciting adventure. They look forward to doing new things, seeing new things, and experiencing new things. The great news is that even after five years, ten years, or even fifty years of marriage the two of you can still experience new things, or do things you haven’t done together in a while. This variety will help you keep passion alive in your relationship. Let me show you how you can perform your own relationship rescue. Marriage Success Building Exercise Do this exercise together. Take some paper and make three columns on the first piece. In the first column, write down everything you like to do. Take five minutes and write down everything you can think of. Now use the second column to write down everything your spouse likes to do. Make sure to capture as many things as you can think of. Take about five minutes for this exercise. Look at the items in the first two columns and put down all of those things the two of you both like to do in the third column. Take as much time as you need to do this. Now take another sheet of paper. Make two columns on this sheet. Take about five minutes and brainstorm to come up with things both of you would like to do. Put anything down here that sounds like fun. Come up with as many things as the two of you can. Now, when you are done, take some time to go through your wish list. Some of the items on your list may not be easy to do. Some may cost a lot of money, or may require other resources you may or may not have access to. Once you have done this, take the items from the first column on this piece of paper and write them down on the second column. Now go back to your first piece of paper and take the items from the third column and put those in this column as well. Now the two of you should have a long list of things you enjoy doing together as well as things you would like to do one day. This will help you in your relationship rescue! Have A Great Story About Doing New Things?What are new things you and your spouse do to keep your marriage exciting and new? Share it! Return from Relationship Rescue Do New Things to Dialed In Love Advice
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